Comments on: A Story of Injustice (Mostly) And Justice (A Little)

By: Sexism Sucks « Wyrdbyrd’s Wyrld

Sexism Sucks « Wyrdbyrd’s Wyrld — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 19:28:05 +0000

[...] rungs lower on the ladder than just about any man around, no matter how incompetent he may be. (Read my own experience, if you’d like.) If this isn’t depressing, I don’t know what [...]

By: wyrdbyrd

wyrdbyrd — Tue, 06 May 2008 03:05:21 +0000

Ovidia, you make some excellent points. As always. It’s not an angle I have really looked at this incident from: what if I hadn’t done it? Would I have criticized myself for being taken advantage of and not trying to right the wrong? Would I have stayed in the job, becoming more angry and more a victim?

My husband and I talked about this the other night for the first time in a long time and he said, “That was such a horrific, horrific time.” It was. I am so glad it’s over. I told him I think some people are really tough and can handle that kind of thing and some people are not (like me) and it affects them for a long, long time. Maybe there should be some kind of counseling for women thinking about going down that road, telling them what is likely to happen, the worst case scenarios, the possibility that, even if they are right, they may lose. That even if they win, they may lose.

By: Ovidia Yu

Ovidia Yu — Sat, 03 May 2008 07:25:34 +0000

Dear Wyrdbyrd, I only just saw your post–it must have so been difficult to write & even more difficult to live through!
I wish I could find something positive to say (okay here’s one: it would have been worse if the old guys were reasonable & the young ones were wearing the ball blinders…) but reading what you went through makes me wish I believed in voodoo or something & could stick pins in a little chief doll…
Glad you spoke up in spite of the consequences.
If you had not, you would probably have gone on taking on more work & responsibilities @ same pay & recognition. Then when you got propositioned by chief’s chief or some other guy (it would have happened sooner or later) you would either have had the life spark crushed out of you & accepted it as part of the price or not–& been fired then… with the same lies & aspersions hanging over you.
Don’t think you were ‘naive’ though. You gave them the chance to behave as decent human beings and they failed.

yes, saw the Rebecca Solnit piece on darkorph & loved it!!!

By: wyrdbyrd

wyrdbyrd — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 00:46:39 +0000

Thank you, all, for your supportive and kind comments. I have not been able to bring myself to feel proud of myself, instead I think how could I have been so naive and so unaware of the consequences? I thought because I was right it would simply be a matter of proving it. I didn’t expect lies and dishonesty. Ah well, it’s over.

In the interest of brevity, I cut out a lot of pertinent details (for instance, a DOL audit that determined I should be paid the same as the men).
The ONLY reason I went through with it was because I knew I was right.

Interestingly, remembering all this brought to mind a conversation I had with a man I dated shortly after I started this job. He worked for another government agency and said emphatically that there was no such thing as sexism in the workplace. How ironic. It’s like my life just had to prove him wrong (of course, I didn’t even agree with him when he said it). Leave it to a man to know that there’s no such thing as sexism.

Fran, How did the legislation go astray? The R word. As the article said, “Senate Republicans killed the bill.”

By: yogamum

yogamum — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 23:48:09 +0000

p.s. tagged you on something!

By: FranIAm

FranIAm — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 20:56:41 +0000

Wow. What a story. I find my own self shaking with some rage upon hearing it.

It is angering – isn’t it?

Yet it is not an unusual tale.

I am so sorry you had to go through that. And you handled it well by even going back in there a second time and then having him fire you!

Brava – in the end you prevailed.

Now how did this legislation go so awry?

By: Kirsten

Kirsten — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:04:20 +0000

Yeah, stunned is a good word. I needed a day to process just the fact that you had to go through that.

FWIW, I’m incredibly proud of you for standing up for yourself. And those women who followed you would be too, if they knew the story.

By: yogamum

yogamum — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 04:31:42 +0000

That story just stunned me. I am so sorry you had to go through all of that. And I can’t believe how far we STILL have to go on the equal pay issue. Unbelievable.

By: A Gift, Wrapped In A Gift | De Die In Diem

A Gift, Wrapped In A Gift | De Die In Diem — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 16:40:06 +0000

[...] Dear friends, over at wyrdbyrd I wrote about a difficult episode in my life. It’s called A Story of Injustice (Mostly) And Justice (A Little). Please read it, comment if you feel inclined. [...]